Our Journey began's to Halifax Canada...

After waiting for months, being at Lake Powell and getting the news about my dad, I really didn't know if Lisa and I were going to be able to make our trip to Canada to see Mom and Michael,(they are serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada) they have been out about 10 months. Lisa and I really struggled with knowing what we should do.

So when the news came of  Dad's progress we made the decision to still go. Lisa and her family had driven up from Phoenix to Orem so they could attend a family reunion on Steve's side of the family. Lisa and I  flew out from Salt lake City together, bright and early on Wednesday morning July 7th. Little did we know this was just the started of a fun but crazy trip.

Sisters

Christi and Lisa

Thank you

Thank you for all the kind words of support and prayers in our behalf. This has meant a lot to me and our family. Some are a little more aware of the situation then others. We have had to put one of our children in a residential behavioral treatment center today and they will be there for 8 weeks or so. This was a very hard decision for us, but we know it is what we needed to do. We have felt the peace and reassurance that the Lord's hand has been involved.

Because Sometimes it's Hard....

As I sit here and write this post, I woke up early and could not go back to sleep. I usually can't fall asleep, so to get up early for me never really happens.

My heart is heavy and my mind is full. I have been thinking about what it means to be a mother and what really that title involves, one of the biggest joys and one of the hardest things you will ever do. See, we are Mothers forever, our role never ends. As our children are born and grow the dynamics of the family changes, with the first child you experience all the firsts. Then you soon realize you have to set guidelines that you will need to put in place as each child reaches a certain age.

You also soon find out how different each little person is, and what works for one doesn’t always work for all. Each child is on a journey, just like you and me. In reality that could be further along spiritually than we are. I know we as parents think we are older and know more than they do and for the most part we do. We have more experience and knowledge. But there is a lot that we can learn from them.
Then when things aren’t right or there seems to be a problem. Who is to help that child, but us their parent. We are their advocate; we are to fight and protect them and then sometimes let them fall flat on their face. It’s not easy to watch your child suffer.

It’s hard to have to make decisions that can and will affect their life forever. Am I doing what is right? Am I doing the best I can? Only you can work through that with the Lord. So can or should we judge others, no? We do not know the situation. Our challenges differ but we all have them. Lets us love more, judge less. Lets us smile and hug each other along this journey of life. Let us lift when others are down.
The point of this post is that I am having to make a very hard decision for my child that I love and yet suffers everyday, in turn causes me and the rest of the family to suffer. I need to give this child the tools they will need to cope and deal with the rest of their life. But I can not do this by myself anymore, I know that now. When the issue is too big and beyond my abilities to help. Because it is hard to let go and to do what is needed. I pray the Lord will guide and direct me in all I do, and I pray for love and support even when I do not feel that I deserve it. May my heart and mind be given peace that I need.