As I sit here and write this post, I woke up early and could not go back to sleep. I usually can't fall asleep, so to get up early for me never really happens.
My heart is heavy and my mind is full. I have been thinking about what it means to be a mother and what really that title involves, one of the biggest joys and one of the hardest things you will ever do. See, we are Mothers forever, our role never ends. As our children are born and grow the dynamics of the family changes, with the first child you experience all the firsts. Then you soon realize you have to set guidelines that you will need to put in place as each child reaches a certain age.
You also soon find out how different each little person is, and what works for one doesn’t always work for all. Each child is on a journey, just like you and me. In reality that could be further along spiritually than we are. I know we as parents think we are older and know more than they do and for the most part we do. We have more experience and knowledge. But there is a lot that we can learn from them.
Then when things aren’t right or there seems to be a problem. Who is to help that child, but us their parent. We are their advocate; we are to fight and protect them and then sometimes let them fall flat on their face. It’s not easy to watch your child suffer.
It’s hard to have to make decisions that can and will affect their life forever. Am I doing what is right? Am I doing the best I can? Only you can work through that with the Lord. So can or should we judge others, no? We do not know the situation. Our challenges differ but we all have them. Lets us love more, judge less. Lets us smile and hug each other along this journey of life. Let us lift when others are down.
The point of this post is that I am having to make a very hard decision for my child that I love and yet suffers everyday, in turn causes me and the rest of the family to suffer. I need to give this child the tools they will need to cope and deal with the rest of their life. But I can not do this by myself anymore, I know that now. When the issue is too big and beyond my abilities to help. Because it is hard to let go and to do what is needed. I pray the Lord will guide and direct me in all I do, and I pray for love and support even when I do not feel that I deserve it. May my heart and mind be given peace that I need.